I have a confession to make. I wish to be a confident woman but I’m not. I have become weakened by the males in my life that command that I apologize for being a strong woman. I’ve apologized for my independence, beauty, strength, upbringing, work ethics, standards, beliefs, amongst other things.
Why do I feel guilty for confronting the disrespectful? Why does the feeling of sensitivity lead me to apologize for my emotions? Why is my response to crying in public apologizing to the witnesses? Why don’t I feel like I deserve to be in control of my career? Who am I apologizing to? Why am I apologizing? WHY DO I FEEL LIKE I NEED TO APOLOGIZE FOR WRITING THIS?!
And this is my attempt at withdrawing those apologies. And my plea that you would audit your routine and acknowledge where you are apologizing and for what. And my plea that you would hold me accountable to stop apologizing. Dig to the foundation of the apology until you discover the origin. It won’t be easy admittance and what I’m finding even harder is forgiving myself for all of the apologies I’ve released. But it’ll be a healthy discovery and a redeeming test of grace.
"I’m sorry," shouldn’t be a habitual response to conversation. And guilt shouldn’t be a habitual emotional response to strength.